Archive for July, 2004

Possibility of Being Crushed

Jul 21 2004 Published by under Uncategorized

This photo is from about three months ago; I just needed something to post with this possibly long and dramatic entry. This has been one of the most (positively and negatively) stressful weeks since I came back from Japan. About a month ago I submitted my resume and a rather heartfelt cover letter to The Omni Group, a company I’ve fantasized about working for since about five years ago. Just last week, a response came asking how soon I would be in the Seattle area. Say, next week? To make a long story short, I have a phone interview today and if it works out I am going to Seattle next week for a real interview. If that works out, I’m settling down in Seattle for good(ish). This is huge in that it marks the end of the Wisconsin II chapter of my life, the beginning of the Pacific Northwest chapter, and the first time I might actually feel like I’m doing the vague “something awesome” I saw myself doing “when I grow up”. There are still two very formidable and non-obvious-solution barriers in front of me (the phone interview and the real interview), plus all of the logistical problems of moving myself 3000 kilometers, so right now my main emotions are nervousness, trepidation, and Max-Nervousness. In addition to this stress, I am under the influence of stress related to the following things: having been moved to the day shift, where humans are milling around distractingly, the phone rings more than once every three hours, and there is a nearby star visible outside the window; having formally quit my job, making relations strange as I work my final shifts; meeting my own replacement and having to train him (luckily he is a cool guy); finding out my brother is engaged to be married; celebrating Piroko’s birthday in Wisconsin Dells; having drunk about 110 ounces of caffeinated pop today due to aforementioned stress. Right now I should be sleeping but this relentless bout of stomach-butterflies won’t allow it. I’m not sure if, after the phone call, I’ll be relieved or even more distraught. You know you’re getting anxious about a phone call when you imagine you feel your right leg vibrate as if the cell phone in your pocket were ringing, even though you’re not wearing any pants.

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Robo-nami and iPod

Jul 12 2004 Published by under Uncategorized

Tonight at work I made a really dumb mistake that caused several people to have to be awakened, and created a lot of extra work for some people. I’ll probably get in trouble for it soon. On one hand I feel terribly guilty, like I misread a bomb-defusing manual and cut the pinkish wire instead of the cyan-colored one. On the other hand I don’t feel anything at all, probably because I’m tired of being here and it feels like I’ll never again do anything truly exciting outside of a book or video game. I want to team up with Qiang and medically research the ailment that afflicts people who have seen Tokyo life and then returned to the mundane. I may sound like a broken record but that’s probably because whatever record I was playing broke when I left Tokyo. Two weeks ago I became ill. It wasn’t even the mixed blessing of an illness that knocks you down into a position where only sleeping, reading, and playing video games are possible. Instead, the oppressive, ever-present headache prevented me from comfortably doing any of these things. It was painful while I read my Cryptonomicon or played my Xenosaga Episode II, and then while I slept it twisted those excellent escapes into frustrating code-cracking and dungeon-crawling nightmares. Hiroko took very good care of me; she came over every day, even staying over one night, and cooked for me what I can unequivocally call the best soup I’ve ever eaten. Finally I went to a doctor, who told me it was hepatitis, and to call back for my blood test results in a few days. I did, and they told me that whatever it was, it wasn’t hepatitis. It then went away. A famous-among-Xeno-geeks [review][1] of the Episode II premium box tipped my impulsive-buying scales and caused me to order the special Evangelion volume 9 with this Ayanami Rei figure. She is called Robo-nami by people nerdy enough to give nicknames to dolls that come with comic books. I continue to glide along, working, eating, sleeping, seeing Hiroko, joking with Ben and Jon, occasionally having sparks of fun with Oshkosh people, not getting called about a job, and trying to get myself into situations where it’s okay to just read my book or play my game for several hours. [1]:

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